I was contemplating shutting down my blog and my FB page. Then I realized that the blog offers me a place to vent, rage, poke fun at myself, and end all be all, it is a cathartic avenue for me. Such as it will be today I'm hoping. FB is important in alot of different ways. Right now, I need to maintain connection with peeps even tho I want to pull away.
I'm hanging in the Rabbit Hole if you must know. I'm not burrowed very deep, hope not to be, I'm sorta peeking out thru the grassy knolls and keeping on the low. I've lost something very precious to me early yesterday morning. Maybe I had lost my precious boy before that, I don't know.
Trent is my 1st baby. My pride and joy boy. He was definitely a handful to raise lets just say, but I or we thought he was on the right track with his life. There's so much I could tell you about him, but I don't have that much energy or space here on this blog. He was beautiful in every way to me.
Trent was in a dark place that he hid well from us here at home while being stationed at SC. He had support on base from what I'm told and he had the love and support of a beautiful girl. She is beautiful inside and out. The place was so dark and horrific that my beloved son decided to take his life. Now we are all sitting and asking the "whys" and "what-ifs" that go along with suicides. We may never know. No I take that back, we won't EVER know really.
I would never trade knowing you Trent or loving you, even tho I am in such pain right now. Be at peace my loving boy, be at peace. I love you.
Trenton Christopher Howard
June 21, 1988 - May 4, 2011
Oh Noreen.Words fail me. Please know I am thinking of you and your family and sending you love and healing thoughts.I'll call you later.
ReplyDeleteAunt Noreen, I love you so much and Im so sorry for you all ha ing to go through this, I want you to know he will be missed alot, but you already knew that, and we love him so much. I wish you all peace at the house. Dont talk to anyone or respond to anything until you are ready. I love you. - Your neice, Maggie
ReplyDeleteNoreen, thinking about you and sending you love and hugs....I wish I could do more to help you through this, or to do SOMETHING at least.....love you lots....
ReplyDeleteNoreen, Dear Friend... We all have a heavy heart with the loss of Trent. He was such a special young man and made such an impact on so many people in his short life. Please know and accept that the family has many friends that are here for you. Truly here for you.
ReplyDeleteI love you! Krissy
I was just catching up on blogs and saw the note on one of Brian's posts...
ReplyDeleteI'm so incredibly sorry, Noreen. My brother took his life when I was little and a track friend when I was in highschool. While I hesitate to say I understand, I certainly empathize.
My thoughts are most certainly with you.
Thanks alot all of you. It means alot.
ReplyDeleteRP: I've been so caught up in myself that somehow I missed this. My heart goes out to you. Godspeed my friend.
ReplyDelete